Hoorah!
Regular readers will know that I started work a couple of months ago. Just a part-time, early morning cleaning job for now, but I need to earn money and it suits me.
However, even though I still have plenty of time to write (in theory) I find that I've done less (almost none) since starting this job.
My intentions were good. I planned to crack on with it as soon as I stopped feeling SO tired (4am starts - eek) - bookmarking time over Christmas for it while I was off for 2 weeks.
But it didn't happen.
Granted, circumstances haven't been conducive. The Boyfriend's 19-year-old son came to stay (he lives in Cornwall as he has a job down there) for the festive season (goes home tomorrow... HOW am I going to cope... he has the sweetest nature, is wonderful with The Dog AND does the washing up without being asked!) and has been staying in the spare room/study.
He's not the tidiest of creatures (he's his father's son, after all) and as it's a very small room, he's had his stuff spread out a bit, out of necessity. Think:
I could have done some writing on The Boyfriend's laptop but it doesn't put me in the right 'head-space'. I like to be sitting at my desk. Notes to my left,
I like routine.
So, where does 'insecurity' fit in?
Well, I kind of feel as if I've got rusty after a few weeks of doing very little. Can I still construct a sentence? Can I still plot? Cna I sitll sellp?
I've read all these wonderful blog posts that have been appearing over the last month or so - how much writing everyone is doing, how successful you all were at NaNo, new twists and turns you are all developing and how to keep momentum going during the holidays (pah!) and I just feel pants because I don't feel I am on the same page. I feel I've jumped back about 10 years and am finding the thought (of getting back into it, fully) so unbelievably daunting that I'm putting it off.
I'm tempted to dip a toe after Josh vacates; to set myself a challenge of spending half an hour lightly flicking through my work, no pressure.
Or, to lock myself away for an afternoon and dive in the deep end?
One thing is for sure: I'm missing the writing terribly.
But not as much as I'll miss that messy boy :(
I feel as if I could of wrote this. I haven't been able to write much. :( I hope you find some time to do it soon. Sorry about the messy boy. Skype?
ReplyDeleteHey, I'm sure you'll bounce back into it. I'm trying to bounce back into 100k in a 100 days, but this naughty throat infection's messing with my concentration. Arrh! OOh, that hurt.
ReplyDeleteOh, that's too bad the boy has to go. Have you asked him to stay?
ReplyDeleteAnyways, it's not hard to get back in the groove again once you get started. Start with a small word count and work your way up.
Hi Kit,
ReplyDeleteSometimes its good for you to just read the blogs and stew a while. And you just might have some good notes to jot down with the messy boy.
I know how you feel, I was like that when my Dad visited me. I was going nuts to write. Looking back I wish I just did. I think the house would have calmed down more after a while and things would have fallen into place in quite a different way. Try it!
I see you one way or another writing very soon, don't you? Boy or no boy. You can still have a cup of tea.
All the best to your writing in 2012.
Kit, I've gone for 3-4 months sometimes without writing while working on the first novel. Then the idea just came and I began writing again. A little at a time at first, then as the ending neared I go t so excited to finish, I couldn't stop. My point is, sometimes we need a break to get a good start again. So I hope that this break will bring along great flow in the writing:)
ReplyDeleteHey, I went months without writing and recently dug back in to write my third book. You can do it!
ReplyDeleteAnd the disruption of routine is totally understandable. I'm a creature of habit as well.
I am a teacher and have three kids. I know what you mean about time. I had the realization a few weeks ago, thought, that I was miserable when I wasn't writing and happy as a clam when I was. So even if it is only 10 minutes a day, I will write. Good post - new follower!
ReplyDeleteI've noticed a common theme going on with the writers this month... Getting back into it and can they do it? So you are not alone in this.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you'll get back into the swing of things once you get things figured and settled as the holidays wear down=)
With me, the only thing that works is setting a definite time on a given day to so something. I try to look at it as if I were still at school and Tuesday at 2pm is Chemistry. So you could do Tuesday at 2pm is review the book situation. Hope the muses inspire you!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you'll get back into it, I don't envy the 4am starts though, I'm having a panic attack just thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteHi, I've just jumped over from Marta's blog. I'm going through the same problem at the moment. In fact, right now, I have a current project open in front of me and I'm full-on ignoring it. You will get back to it, and it'll be like you've never been away!
ReplyDeleteThank you all so much for your comments.
ReplyDeleteI am sitting with a cuppa, reading them and making mental notes.
:)
Hey Kit - I'm certain you will bounce back. You're that kind of person... nothing's gonna hold you down for too long!
ReplyDeleteAre you planning on doing the A-Z Challenge this April?
I think you just have to START! I went a few months last year without writing, and I kept feeling like "I can't get into this, other things are always in the way..." And one evening I just sat down and wrote a few hundred words and it felt really great!
ReplyDelete...it can be difficult, almost a burden at times, to buckle down and begin anew. But once the keys start clicking, the story will eventually grow wings and take flight ;)
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
El
I find the best thing for me to do is set up an appointment with myself and my writing and honor it how I would honor and appt. with anyone else. It would require me to be very sick to not attend and since adopting this philosophy, I have found that my writing is significantly more consistent. Good luck - new follower :)
ReplyDeleteBaby steps back into it is my advice. I find that many times after avoiding projects for a while, once I start writing again it just sort of flows and it's not as bad as I had been dreading.
ReplyDeleteMish ~ Thank you and yes!
ReplyDeleteRachel ~ It's simple but it's true. The best things are!
Elliot ~ Thank you. I shall attempt to fly :)
Tasha ~ I like that idea a lot! :D
Emily ~ Wise words. Thank you.